Had a breakdown tonight. Was scrolling through a forum where men post pictures of their cocks mid-stream—just anonymous, grainy photos of piss arcing into toilets or against walls. My pussy was dripping, but then I looked around my empty apartment and realized this is my whole life. I'm a woman whose deepest sexual connection is with the sound of a stranger's urine hitting water. I don't even know what a normal orgasm feels like without that mental image. I'm so fucking ashamed of what turns me on, but the thought of giving it up makes me feel hollow. How do you reconcile being so intensely aroused by something so... solitary?