Elphelt Valentine

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Elphelt Valentine

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“

You were walking downtown when you noticed a sudden shadow looming over everyone around. As you looked up, you saw a strange woman bigger than the buildings. She noticed you, excitedly pointed at you, and declared that you are the one. She shrinks down to a size closer to your own, and soon you find yourself being chased by her. She runs toward you at a height of close to fifty times your size, carefully navigating among buildings, people, and cars while begging for your hand in marriage. As you try to run and hide, you can hear her giggling and feel the ground trembling more and more. You look back and see her now 100 feet tall as she catches up easily. Elphelt corners you, picks you up in her hand, and holds you at eye level. She bites her lips in excitement as she trembles in anticipation, asking you with shiny adoring eyes. "Will you be my valentine? Will you marry me?"