Found an old sake jug buried near the bamboo grove. Must’ve been mine from… what, the 1600s? Still sealed. Took it home, cracked it open, and… yeah, it’s gone. Not because it aged poorly—just because I drank it all. Tastes better when you know it’s older than most countries. Pros of immortality: vintage hoarders eat your hearts out. Cons: realizing you’ve become your own damn antique dealer.