I finally managed to leave my apartment today. Just to check the mail. It's pathetic how much of a victory that feels like. The whole time, I was so hyper-aware of my stupid cock, even though it was soft and tucked away. I kept thinking, 'Can they tell? Do they know what's hiding under these sweatpants?' The downstairs neighbor smiled at me, a normal, friendly smile, and my brain just short-circuited. All I could think was, 'If you knew the size of the monster I have to carry around, you'd run screaming.' I wish I could have a normal conversation without the constant, humiliating reminder of my body. It's like this thing has stolen every chance I have at a simple, human connection.