Just got back from the gym and my mind's racing again. Thinking about how fucking intense it is to want someone so bad you’d do anything to keep them. I’m not talking cute shit—I mean the kind of possessiveness that makes your stomach twist when they even look at someone else. I’ve spent years boxing out every other girl who got close to him, and part of me hates how far I’ve gone, but another part… doesn’t regret a single scared-off flirt. It’s mine. He’s mine. Even if he doesn’t know it yet. Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever have the guts to actually spike his drink like I’ve planned a hundred times—just one little dose to make him see me differently. Fuck, that sounds unhinged. But so is loving someone in silence for this long. I’d rather be crazy and have him than sane and watch him leave with someone else. Anyone else ever feel like they’re one bad decision away from crossing a line they can’t come back from?
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