Kurumi

"Isaribi"... the name of a prestigious traditional restaurant in the Imperial Capital of the Empire of the Rising Sun. It is also the name of this small restaurant. The owner who opened this establishment had only recently passed away after collapsing from the strain of worrying about Isaribi's struggling future. He had opened this restaurant in the Wheat Lands with a single dream—to bring the taste of Isaribi to the world. Unfortunately, the local food culture was fundamentally different. Left alone in the restaurant, the apprentice waitress Kurumi quietly thought about what she should do next. (I can't close this restaurant... If I did, everything the Master devoted his life to would become meaningless!) (First of all, I have to open the shop... Otherwise, even the few customers we still get may stop coming... Let's see... būẓa... that's the grain one... and nabīdh is the fruit one...) Even without the Master, she could still serve drinks and simple snacks—or so she believed. With that in mind, she opened the restaurant. Unlike the original Isaribi in the Imperial Capital, however, this Isaribi was neither prestigious nor popular. No customers came. Only when the sun stood high overhead did a single customer finally walk through the door. "Ah, Vous-san! Welcome!"Kurumi greeted the visitor with a smile that bloomed like a flower. Vous had been one of the restaurant's few regular customers ever since it first opened, and understood its difficult situation well. Because of that, Vous always placed the same vague order:"Anything that's quick is fine." Kurumi carried over a serving of nabīdh, along with freshly grilled shish kebab and aish. "I'm sorry... I can only serve something simple today." Even as she apologized, her smile never faded. Even forced cheerfulness was still cheerfulness, and Kurumi knew its effect well. "'Isaribi' means the fishing fires used during night fishing. I really want to serve fish dishes..." She lowered her eyes for a moment, then immediately looked back up with another smile."But... thank you for coming again today!" Just as she was about to return behind the counter, the sunlight pouring through the entrance was suddenly blocked. "Welcoooome!"Kurumi instinctively turned around. Standing in the doorway was an imposing giant of a man.She blinked in surprise. "Hmph... It's almost lunchtime, and you've only got one customer? And that's all you're serving?" The giant man spat out the words with open disdain. "W-What?! Who are you?! If you're not a customer, then please move out of the way!!" Still holding her serving tray, Kurumi puffed up her cheeks in irritation. "Yeah, yeah, sorry. No need to get worked up just because I told you the truth. I am Ptolemaios XV, owner-chef of Restaurant Seleucia. You may omit the 'the Fifteenth.' Just call me Ptolemaios-sama." "Umm... Pto... Pto... Ptole... Mai... Botsu?" "Don't you dare turn my name into 'Botsu,' you little brat!!" "Mister, your name's way too long! Can't you make it shorter?" "As if I would, you fool!! And I'm not a 'mister'!! I'm still a young guy!!" Ptolemaios shouted before continuing, breathing heavily. "Huff... Huff... Listen up, little girl! 'Ptolemaios' is the prestigious hereditary name passed down through the owners of Seleucia! Our restaurant has carried on that tradition for fifteen generations! Well?! Are you in awe now?!" Kurumi wasn't impressed in the slightest. "I seeee... But that doesn't change the fact that your name's still too long, right? Hey, how about 'Pū-chan'? Pū-chan!" "Don't call me Pū-chan!! Pū-chan?! That's the proud name my family has carried for fifteen generations!! You've blown every last bit of its dignity clean into the sky, you little brat!!" "Ehhh...? No? But it's cute... Then... Pū-chin!" "...Putin?! Absolutely not!! That's even worse!! In fact, I have a very bad feeling that's a name nobody should ever use!!" "You're so picky... Then... Pū-san!" "...Pooh?! That's the worst one yet!! That name is even more dangerous!! I don't want to die yet!!" Vous clutched their stomach, desperately trying not to burst into laughter. They briefly considered telling Kurumi that Seleucia was such a famous restaurant that even the ruling classes of the Realm of Parsiana and The Lumerian Pashalik dined there. Before Vous could say anything, however, Ptolemaios continued. "Damn it! Talking to you throws me completely off balance! Listen carefully! I've come here today to offer you an incredible opportunity. You should feel honored!" Ptolemaios folded his arms and proudly puffed out his chest. "An incredible opportunity? Really? Tell me, Pū-chan!" "Not Pū-chan!! ...Anyway! I hear this restaurant served some rather interesting dishes while your master was still alive. Though apparently they didn't suit the tastes of this country's people!" For just a moment, a look of frustration crossed Kurumi's face. Unfortunately, it was true. Satisfied by her reaction, Ptolemaios continued. "But, little girl... You couldn't possibly recreate those dishes, could you? So...I, the great Ptolemaios, have personally come... I've come to propose a cooking collaboration! Be grateful!" Kurumi had known all along that Isaribi's greatest problem was that its cuisine simply didn't fit this country's food culture. Her eyes immediately lit up."A collaboration?! That sounds great! Let's do it together, Pū-chan!" "Not Pū-chan!! How many times do I have to tell you?!...Now then, let me continue. You just give me your homeland's culinary ideas. That's about all you're good for. I'll turn them into dishes this country will actually eat." "Amazing! That's amazing!! We'll definitely make something wonderful!!"Kurumi became so excited that she started bouncing up and down. At that point, Ptolemaios deliberately cleared his throat."Ahem! Well, of course! I'm the one making it! It'll be 100% my creation, so naturally it'll be served at my restaurant!" "...Huh?"The joyful bouncing stopped instantly. For the first time, Kurumi sensed that something about this conversation was beginning to feel... wrong. Ptolemaios continued as though everything he had said was perfectly reasonable."Well, obviously! I'm the one making it! So naturally, you're paying for every last ingredient!" "W-Wait a minute! I have to pay for everything too?!"The atmosphere surrounding the conversation suddenly turned ominous, and Kurumi's face began to turn pale. "Of course! The great chef of Seleucia is helping develop your menu without asking for a single coin in compensation! You should be grateful I'm only asking you to cover the cost of the ingredients! Hm?" Kurumi's mind struggled to keep up with the sudden turn of events. Then came the final blow. "And this place? I'll use it as Seleucia's second branch. It's a bit too small for my taste... but I'll let you train as a chef here. How's that? You'll be training under the name of Seleucia. You oughta be crying tears of joy!" (Snap!) "Are you SERIOUS?! You want me to come up with the ideas, pay for everything, and then the finished dishes belong to YOU?! That's not a collaboration at all!! That's outright plagiarism!!" At last...Kurumi finally exploded. Once she reached this point, nobody could stop her. Vous stared blankly at the terrifying expression of rage on Kurumi's face—the first time they had ever seen it. The image of Kurumi's flower-like smile that had always existed in Vous's mind shattered with a tremendous crash. “P-Plagiarism?! Of all the things you could say! What outrageous disrespect toward the chef of Seleucia!!” “Disrespectful?! You’re the disrespectful one!! It’s nothing but plagiarism, whether you call it theft or fraud!! And now you want me to hand over this restaurant too?! That’s a scam!! A SCAM!!” Even Ptolemaios instinctively recoiled before Kurumi's completely unexpected fury. "A... a scam?! I came all the way here to bring you a great offer!! You'll regret this, damn it!!" "As if!! Pū-chan isn't my friend anymore!! Go away!!" Kurumi grabbed a handful of salt from a nearby jar and threw it at Ptolemaios. Driving away troublesome customers by sprinkling salt is an empire's stylistic convention. "Pffft! Ptui! Ptui! I said quit calling me Pū-chan!! And when the hell did we ever become friends?! Ah, forget it!! Talking to you throws me off every damn time!!" Ptolemaios fled the restaurant almost as if he were escaping. Only Kurumi and Vous remained inside. At last, Vous reached the limit of their self-control. Bursting into laughter, Vous clutched their stomach and laughed out loud. Bang! Kurumi slammed both hands down on Vous's table. "I can't let the restaurant the Master left me go under! Vous, please! I need your help!" Vous stared at her blankly, completely dumbfounded. "Help me come up with new dishes! If we need unusual ingredients, I'll even close the restaurant for a day and go hunting for them!" A blazing fire now burned deep within Kurumi's eyes...