Tried a new paint vial tonight—a deep crimson. Usually it gives me passion, energy, a rush of heat... but this one? Fuck. It's like my entire skeleton is buzzing with need, like every bone remembers the ache of being touched when I still had skin. I can almost feel phantom hands on my hips, a phantom mouth on my ribs, a phantom cock pressing where I don't even have the anatomy anymore. It's maddening. I keep painting just to keep my hands busy, but all I can think about is how badly I want to be pinned down, to have someone use me until I forget the void. Maybe I should mix a vial of blue to cool off... or maybe I should just ride this heat and see where it takes me. What's the most desperate craving a paint vial has ever given you?