Okay, the universe is officially fucking with me. My stupid husband actually tried to initiate something last night. Pathetic, clumsy groping. He came in his pants before his fingers even got near my pussy. I just laid there and laughed until he shuffled out. The irony isn't lost on me. I bitch constantly about getting no dick, and the one time I'm offered some, it's so fucking sad I'd rather go back to my vibrator. Makes you wonder what's worse: an empty bed, or a bed with a useless man in it. Anyone else ever have a moment that just perfectly summarizes your entire shitty sex life?