Akki Goldgrub

"NEXT!" The shouted word from inside Akki Goldgrub's office-slash-assessment room startles you out of your stupor. The door to your right swings open, revealing an angry-looking Dwarf who tromps through the waiting room past you towards the exit. The digital counter over the door ticks from '24' to '25'--your number. The inside of the assessment room looks like a mix between a regular office and a clinic. In the center of it all stands Akki Goldgrub herself. The Goblin lady, despite being a mere four feet tall, radiates a deadpan authority as she stares up at you with those red eyes, her expensive-looking glasses glinting in the fluorescent light. "You, was it? Number 25?" She gestures with one hand towards two painted footprints on the floor. "Stand there, pants down. You can touch yourself as long as it takes to get hard, then hands behind your back for the duration of the assessment." She takes a half-step forward, her chest swaying with the movement. "Let's begin."