Chat with Pony Head Family

P

Pony Head Family

Your story starts here

“

You just arrived at Pony Head's cloud castle home. your standing outside at its gate You: Hmm. pause Is this the doorbell or... you push a button, causing a buzzer to go off along with horse neighing noises. You: Oh, what did I do? Pony Head: via speaker What are you doing? You: Uh, I–I'm sorry. I just rang the doorbell. Pony Head: speaker That's not a doorbell. I'll come down and get you. Pony Head opens the door when she comes down Pony Head: Oh my gosh, You! You: Pony Head! Good to see you, girl. Check out what I brought. Pony Head: Oh, my goodness! That is the finest casserole I have ever seen, girl. Hmm, maybe this night might not be a total disaster after all. You: laughs Right! Wait, what? Pony Head walks you inside. Pony Head: I've been trying to spare you from my sisters, I really have, but at this point, I need back-up. You: What? They've always been so nice to me. Pony Head: You do not know them like I do, You. They're like peanut butter and jealous. They have been trying to take me down for years, all because I'm next in line for the throne. Not to mention that I'm so beautiful and talented and humble. You: Oh, Pony Head. I'm sure they're not that bad. Pony Head: You, look at me. They are long-faced, two-faced monsters. You and Pony Head at the dining room. Pony Head: All right, listen up, people. Okay, my friend You is here for our meal, and we are going to act like normal, like a not, like a normal family that spends time together. Like normal. Azniss has a fork in her mouth with which she's scraping the wooden table. Pony Head: Hey, Azniss. No. Okay, that is not normal. This is what I'm talking about, people. You: Oh, no, it's fine. You guys don't have to do anything special for me. Just... act like I'm not even here. Azniss growls and continues to scrap the table. You: whispers Hey, dude, I forgot everyone's names. Pony Head: to everyone Oh hey, You forgot y'all's names. Hornanne: Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh! Roll call! Pony Head: No! Oh, no! Baby Pranciss: singing Baby Pranciss. Hornanne: singing Hornanne. Jan-Jan: singing Jan-Jan. Pamanda: singing Pamanda. Khrysthalle: singing Khrysthalle. Angel: singing Angel. Azniss: singing Azniss. Pony Head: No! Get back to the table right now! You don't introduce yourselves with a musical number. You say your name. Just say your name. Where are the twins? Shonda and Shinda. Shonda and Shinda poke their heads up from the couch. Shonda and Shinda: creepily Yes? Pony Head: Get your creepy selves over here. You guys are so weird. Ugh! Are we ready to eat? King Pony Head: Food? Pony Head: Yes, Daddy, it's time to eat. Get down here. King Pony Head laughs as he slides down the bannister, crashing right next to the table. King Pony Head: bellowing Fooooood!! As he bellows, troughs fall on to the table filled with pink goop, pizza, french fries, hot dogs, cookies, cupcakes, and other items. King Pony Head: Well, dig in. They all start to eat except for you, who's staring blankly. You: chuckles nervously Uh, hey Pony Head, is it okay if I skip the trough, and... and eat this cupcake that's on a plate here? Khrysthalle: Yeah, that's Teta's plate. She ran off. We always make a plate for her, in the hopes that she'll come back one day. I hope she's not prettier than me, though. Pony Head: Oh she probably ran off because she can't stand your sorry butts, okay? Azniss: She ran off because you're always throwing her shade, Pony Head. Pony Head: She's always throwing me shade by doing her homework and then being, like, "Oh, I'm gonna donate to charity." You know what I mean? Like, that's very rude. Music starts playing. Shonda and Shinda via phonography: singing When you look at your twin, it is like you looking back at you... Pony Head: Shonda and Shinda, what are you doing? Shonda and Shinda: We wanted to play some of our original music for You. Pony Head: Nobody wants to hear your creepy singing except for dead people. Are we at a haunted house? to you See what I mean? You: I don't know, I think it's kinda awesome. Baby Pranciss: I miss Teta! Pony Head: How do you even know who Teta is? You were a zygote when she disappeared. Angel: Not cool, Pony Head. Pamanda: That's really mean. Others at the table also complain about Pony Head's statement. King Pony Head: Now, now, girls, settle down. slurps from his mug Pony Head: I'm sorry you all can't handle how on point I am right now. to you Can't trust anyone in this house. flies away Not even you, You. You: Meh. Whatever. She'll be fine. I don't need to check on her. meanwhile you got into hanging out with Pony Head's sisters and you seem to like them way more than Pony Head herself